It’s midnight again. It’s been awhile guys. I’m toggling between the urge to sleep ( which has been the most rational choice that has been deterring me from writing these days) and spending the next hour putting these thoughts into words that would hopefully make sense in the morning. So here I am again, writing to you & I hope this piece would make sense at midnight.
I’ve been thinking about this word ‘perfection’. Well, I’m someone that cringes when people compliment and praise me. As I sheepishly thank the kind soul for being so lovely with his/her words, I can’t help but think that hey, I’m not all that they give me credit for. I’m a bundle of flaws stitched up into an organised mess that’s trying to get by. How lovely, to know that he/she sees me in a much better light than I make myself out to be.
That brings my mind to the thought of PERFECTION. How we look up to people who inspire us or simply someone we idolise and deem PERFECT ( or someone we can only wish to be like one day). How we look at the people that are more successful, beautiful and well put together than us and feel so much less. How the tousle between feeling unconfident and unbeautiful would always be at the back of our minds. How the idea of PERFECTION is just a myth, an unattainable goal that we could only wish to inch closer towards but never ever reach.
Why are you, why are we trying to be perfect? Why are you, why am I spending days beating myself up for not being good enough? Why are you, why am I always feeling worried for no reason? Why are you, why am I having moments where I would hide away under the sheets and feel unprepared to take on the day. Why are you, why am I not able to give myself a pat on the back when credit is due? Why are you, why am I comparing myself to people stronger/smarter/more beautiful/talented than me and unknowingly feeling less than I actually am. Why are you, why am I thinking about issues I know aren’t worth batting an eyelid about and are absolutely unnecessary but I do so anyway?
So here’s to you, my fellow-I-don’t-think-I’m-good-enough-er: Chin up and control those thoughts. Yknow what I mean, the thoughts that come to you when you’re feeling the lowest, experiencing stress or simply having an empty pocket of time, nothing to do and your mind wanders. When you feel like you’re not good enough no matter how hard you try. When you feel like you’ll never reach your goals, achieve your dreams and make someone proud.
I’m here to say: Stop trying to be perfect. Stop beating yourself up for not being good enough or drowning your mind with senseless worries. As you take stress and negative thoughts head on, know at the back of your mind that this will pass. Steady your heart and correct this idea of being PERFECT or achieving this idea of PERFECTION is simply bulls**t. Embrace the beauty in setbacks, trials and challenges. Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about no matter how perfect things may seem. Stop being so hard on yourself as you try to be a little better than the person you were the day before. Make mistakes, get your heart broken, face issues and know that overcoming these in the past has made you the person you are today. Use these to shape your future and learn from each & every person/issue you come across. Embrace all there is that makes you human, find the beauty in being imperfect and enjoy the pursuit of improving yourself every day. Be this beautiful ball of mess, stitched up with good intentions. Stop trying to be perfect, just focus on being YOU.